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Whether you're bouncing back after a divorce, or recovering from the death of your life partner, returning to the dating scene is never easy.Indeed, from the challenge of meeting someone new, to wondering if he'll call again, to those inevitable questions about sex and intimacy, the prospect of getting back in the groove can seem downright daunting.Ask about his interests and how he spends his time, and share the same information about yourself with him. Try to make the outing entertaining and interesting -- for both of you.
When the time arrives that you do feel ready, when, how, and where is less important than basic safety.There is no guarantee that you are going to like your sister-in-law's newly divorced first cousin, of course, but the connection ensures that your date is not a complete unknown. Arrange to meet at a cafÃ© or restaurant rather than at your home or his. For your first meeting, it is best to arrange a coffee date rather than a dinner or an afternoon at a museum.Once you've made a connection -- either online, through friends, or by striking up a conversation with someone in the grocery store -- and you've arranged to get together, there are some important things to remember. If you have made a connection online and know nothing about your date, you may want to be extra cautious by letting a friend know where you will be meeting and at what time. If you don't seem to be hitting it off, it's easier for both parties when there's a quick escape route!If your date can't handle the fact that you want to protect yourself, you probably aren't interested in him anyway." If your relationship continues -- and it's an exclusive arrangement for both of you -- unprotected sex might be OK but only after you both get tested for sexually transmitted diseases -- and wait for reassuring results.Experts warn not to take risks, no matter how convincing your partner may be.
Moreover, to help ease the anxiety of a first-time date, Rosenfeld suggests you "sandwich" the meeting between two other activities you really like.